


It Didn't Have To Be This Way

by SnowXeno



Category: Original Work
Genre: Apocalypse, Blood and Gore, Delusions, Depression, M/M, Mentioned drugging and kidnapping, Murder, Nuclear Winter, Suicidal Thoughts, Wendigos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-19 16:29:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15513891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowXeno/pseuds/SnowXeno
Summary: Sometimes you do things you regret.





	1. Chapter 1

In 2030, a nuclear war occurred, turning Earth into a land of ice and snow. This seemingly never-ending winter, called a nuclear winter, was caused by the dust and smoke that now fills our atmosphere. Amazingly, mankind has survived for another one hundred years, somehow. Humans now live in bubbled cities, not that you would want to live there. In most of these cities your chances of living are honestly lower than the chance living outside of them, even though the outside world is filled with plenty things that want to kill you. Mutants lurk outside, creatures figured to be simply myth now rear their ugly maws for all to see. But you learn to get around all these things sooner or later. 

 

I haven't been inside a city in close to ten years now. While I do get near to scavenge for gear and sometimes food scraps, I never enter them. In the wild you must limit your ethics, such as taking from the dead. Throw that shit right out the window. If you are not taking from the dead, I promise that you will not last long. Corpses have tons of valuable things on them such as heavy-duty clothes, weapons, food, and other useful supplies. God knows the things I've taken from bodies. In fact, most of the clothes I'm wearing now I've stripped off bodies. Killing other people, another thing that you are going to need to do, whether it is because they are trying to kill you, or they're turning into some creature or, some other reason, you're going to have to do it at some point. One more thing to keep in mind, never, never give anyone your full trust. They will stab you in the back.

***

I moved quickly around the wall that the city was surrounded by, looking for any trash that could be useful. You know, the whole "one man's trash is another man's treasure" thing. It was rare to find anything that really wasn't trash though, and or rotting beyond use. I was digging through as pile of junk when I heard a creaking noise. Now, there were secret passages that led outside of the city. Not many of the people in the cities knew of them, and the ones who do know rarely use them. Most of the time it's people like me, scavengers, who use them to enter and exit cities after getting supplies we cannot find outside from the city. Which is why I found it odd to see a boy, not even dressed appropriately for the harsh waste land, slip out of the door.

 

"You'll freeze dressed like that," I said, startling him. Whether it was me speaking that made him jump or my appearance that startled him. Scavengers often dressed to blend in, which includes clothes that range from white to black. Gas masks are often a common sight among scavengers as well: makes it a hell of a lot easier to breath in the wind and cold. Another common sight is antlers attached to hats or hoods, even deer skulls on scavenger's heads. No creatures mess with the Wendigos, so if you look like one, you're as safe as you can from most of the monsters out here. 

 

"I-I am not gonna be out here for long, I watch how cold I get." The boy shivered. I watched him for a second then went back to digging through the trash pile. "So, um, what's your name?" he asked. 

 

I glanced his way and paused and gave the idea of telling him some thought. I sighed and looked his way, "My name is Michael, now go back inside. City folk like you freeze fast." 

 

He looked surprised that I answered him, but out of the corner of my eye I saw a grin spread on his face. "I'm fine right now, thank you, and my name is Julien," Julien said. 

 

"Good for you, now go back inside." I huffed, irritated by this bo-- Julien's need to talk to me. 

 

"Why are you so concerned about me being outside?" Julien asked, tilting his head to the side. 

 

"Because you're letting cold air in, and you're dressed for the inside, not the outside. I can see frost building up on your hair. Now go back in before I force you to," I snapped. 

 

Julien just smiled wider. "Come on, do it then. Force me back into the city." He laughed. I sighed and stood, I turned to face him. Now, I have to say I'm intimidating for the most part. I stand above six feet tall, wearing all grey with pelts from animals. Not to mention the large rack of horns attached to the helmet I'm wearing. 

 

"I think you may want to reconsider this," I snort, walking over to Julien. As I move closer to Julien, he gets the full view of my total stature. I easily tower over Julien by two or three feet. He has to crane his neck up to look up at me. 

 

"Well, I will admit you looked a lot smaller and less threatening crouching down. But I still doubt you could force me back in." Julien smirked. I could see him starting to shake, an obvious sign of over exposure to the cold. I sighed and easily picked him up. He weighed next to nothing. "Hey, put me down!" Julien yelped. 

 

"You asked for this, besides you should be thanking me, I'm saving your ass from hypothermia." I smirked. I pulled open the hidden door and bent over and took off my helmet, so it didn’t get caught on the ceiling. 

 

Julien looked up at me and snorted, holding back a laugh. "I wasn’t expecting blonde hair from someone like you." He giggled. 

 

I glared down at him, "What do you mean by that." I grumbled. 

 

"I was told all scavengers had dark hair or make their hair darker." Julien marveled. It was weird having someone be surprised over my hair color. But then again, most people didn’t look like me, most people I've seen all my life looked like Julien; brown or black hair, and dark colored eyes. Light colored hair was extremely rare and was often very much of value. People who were considered upper class either had naturally light-colored hair or had enough money to make their hair lighter, but for those of us who lived in the shittiest parts of the city, kids with light colored hair where pets. 

 

"I don't have any need too; a helmet and a hood hide it just fine." I clarified. 

 

"Well, you should probably hide it before we get back--." Julien answered. 

 

"I've been in cities before, I know what to do." I interrupted, Julien backed down after that. I set him down before the entrance to the city. "Hurry and leave so I can continue on my way. You've wasted enough of my time." I complained. 

 

Julien pouted, "Before you go, can I ask one more thing?" 

 

I sighed, reaching under my gas mask to rub my face. "Okay fine, what do you want to know. But I swear to god if you ask me to take you with the answer is no." I huffed. 

 

"How old are you?" Julien inquired. I starred at Julien for a second then put my helmet on and started walking away. I was not going to deal with this kid anymore, though by going off appearances, I probably wasn’t much older than him. "Come on, please! I just want to know. If it really that big of a deal?" Julien whined, grabbing onto my coat trying to slow my walking as I lowered myself to avoid the ceiling again. I gently pushed him off me and walked out of the small hallway and back outside where I quickly walked away from the city.

***

It wasn't long until I found myself back at the same city that Julien lived in. Not that I needed to be over by it, but the long-haired goat I had just wounded ran that way. I don't have time to waste on trying to avoid the city for an idiotic reason. Food is more important than avoiding some city kid, especially since something else could get the goat.

 

I follow the trail of blood from the goat, only to hear someone call out to me. 

 

"Michael!" Exclaimed Julien. I sighed and kept walking, I really needed this goat. I waved my hand in greeting but kept following the trail. "Michael come here!" Julien begged like an impatient child. I barely knew this kid, yet he was acting like we have been lifelong friends. Honestly, it was really annoying. 

 

He kept calling out for me to come over to the door until I lifted my gas mask and yelled, "Look I can't come over I'm busy. I'm trying not to starve out here and I need to get to my kill before anything else does, so go back in side." I continued walking as I pulled my mask back down, changing my quick walks to a slow jog. _That stupid kid is going to get himself killed one day by staying out here too long_ , I thought as I caught up to the goat. 

 

Skinning and carving out the goat was easy, I took anything I needed with me such as its pelt, horns, hooves, teeth, leg bones, and of course its meat. I decided to take the same route that I came on, which was a lot faster than my normal route, which was walking a large semicircle around a small destroyed and looted town and the bubble city. When I reached the city, the blowing of the wind had picked up, carrying loose snow with it making it hard to see. Luckily my gas mask has a face cover as well, so my eyes were covered. Once again, I heard that idiot calling out to me. _I'm going to have to drag him back into the city aren’t I_ , I thought sighing. I moved his way, sliding the bloodied axe I had been carried into my bag. 

 

"Get into the city now." I snapped, I grabbed his arm and dragged him into the hidden door. I looked down at Julien who had a wide smile on his face. "Why are you so happy?" I breathed. 

 

"Well, I want us to be friends. One because you seem lonely, two because I want to know about the outside world." Julien grinned. 

 

I stared at the boy with a blank expression and sighed. "Okay fine, we can be friends. But I strain the word friends. Besides you can just ask the other scavengers to tell you about the winter wonderland that is our home. Just, can you stay inside at least?" Julien nodded excitedly. 

 

"Wait, wait, wait, could you come into the city? I mean, I see that you have food on you, we could cook it." Julien offered, tugging on my sleeve. 

 

"No, I'm not coming into the city. I haven't and will not ever go back into a city. Not only do I have terrible memories of cities, I distrust everyone in cities." I retorted. _A glass of water, dizziness, nothingness, then suddenly pain. Blood there's blood everywhere, on my hands and the axe in my hands, I need to leave_. I rapidly blink as I heard Julien respond. 

 

"Do you not trust me?" Julien whimpered. 

 

"I barely know you, of course I don’t trust you!" I barked. 

 

"How can I get you to trust me?" Julien sighed, sadness resting on his face. 

 

"Stop pressuring me to do things I don’t want too, and for the love of the gods, stop going outside. Look I'll just meet you in here, okay?" I answered. 

 

"Well, can we start by you taking all your," Julien motioned to his face, "face covering stuff off? I mean you don't have to if you don’t want to. I just wanna see what you look like without you face gear." I watched him for a few seconds. _It would be dangerous if I did, what if there were other people watching us?_ I Looked at him, deciding that maybe I should just take the risk. I pulled off my helmet and my gas mask, revealing my short, wavy blonde hair and light blue eyes. I scratched at the light amount of facial hair that I've neglected to shave. 

 

"You are, or well look, a lot older than I thought you were." Julien blurted. 

 

"How old do you think I am?" I inquired, finding it kind of humorous. 

 

Julien glanced away, looking very awkward, "Um, forty?" He guessed. 

 

"I'm twenty, and how old are your exactly? My first guess was that you weren't too far from my age, but now I'm starting to doubt that idea. I'm guessing your twelve." I smirked teasingly. 

 

"Well, I'll have you know that I'm seventeen years old! I just look young." Julien huffed, his cheeks red with embarrassment. I laughed at him, maybe having someone to talk to wouldn't be so bad.

***

I won't lie, Julien wormed his way into my frozen heart. It took a few months of tense and awkward conversations that usually went nowhere such as, "What did you do today?", "Same thing I did the day before." You know, small talk, but conversation was never my expertise, I was used to living on my own. Sometimes Julien would bring me some food, thinking to share, but I would turn him down for the fear of it being drugged, and honestly, I wouldn’t doubt it. Having someone with light colored hair, such as mine, could drastically bring up a family's wealth and ranking. But if they weren't the father or mother, it usually wasn’t good for the other person.

 

Sometimes I would bring him things from the waste land, like bones or pelts for his family to sell or keep, I honestly didn’t care what they did with the items. Sometimes Julien would give me things in return such as metal he had found or some medical supplies he swiped. I couldn’t give them much because I too needed the bones and pelts, and he couldn’t give me much for a similar reason.

***

It had been about a month after I met Julien that I made the second worst mistake of my life. I had been hunting another goat, which isn't easy. I didn’t have any projectile weapons like a bow or a gun, I had to set traps that would wound it. When I came to a trap that I had set, thinking I saw ram horns behind the bush where the trap was I pulled out my axe. I should have looked closer, because when I stepped around the bush, it was not a ram caught in my trap. It was a large and very pissed wendigo. It was crouched and waiting to attack, it had been waiting for me to return.

 

I leapt back as it swiped its massive claw towards me. I started to run, if I didn’t get out of there I would be its next meal. I felt its claws rake across my back, shredding almost through all my layers. I ran faster, but it grabbed the back of my torn clothes and whipped me to the ground. I groaned in pain when I hit the ground. I felt its hot, rancid breath on my face. I was frozen with fear, but I knew I had to do something to survive. I clenched the handle of my axe and smashed it into its skull, it screeched in pain, but I didn’t stop. Survival of the fittest and all that. A thick black liquid poured onto me, I guess it's probably its equivalent to its blood. I gagged and kicked the wendigo away from me as I hopped to my feet. It swiped its wicked claws at my legs cutting through my pants and into my thigh drawing blood. 

 

Adrenaline kicked in and I ran as fast as I could with my injury. My mind was focused on getting away that I didn’t see where I was running. My feet carried me towards the city. I felt its claws hit my back again, ripping through my flesh, leaving deep lacerations in my back. I could feel the hot flood running down my back and leg, and I knew it was exciting the wendigo more. 

 

I pushed myself when I realized where I was running, all I need was some distance between us and I could get into the hidden door and be safe. It was a miracle that I got in and got the door closed in time. The creature bashed against the heavy-duty door, but it wouldn’t budge. I knew it wouldn’t be leaving the area for a while, especially because it had gotten a taste of my blood. I had no idea how long I would last long without medical supplies, so I ventured into the city. A small part of me hoping I could just find Julien. 

 

I slipped quickly into the city. I remembered Julien telling me where he lived vaguely, and honestly, I don’t remember half that conversation. I moved along the shadows the best I could, trying to follow his directions to his home. It wasn’t long before I started panting from exhaustion, I could feel my wounds twitching in agitation. I paused taking a break, leaning on my good leg. I heard a door slam, whether it was opening or closing I wasn’t sure right away. 

 

"Michael? Oh, god is that blood." I heard Julien fussing, but I wasn’t paying too much attention, I felt really tired. I let Julian lead me into his home and help me sit down. I yelped in pain as the lacerations on my back met the back of a chair. 

 

"I'm gonna go get some water and bandages. Try not to move too much." Julian said as he quickly went to a small room that was probably the bathroom. The blood loss and exhaustion clouding my mind. I slowly move my head to watch for Julien. He walked out with a small box marked full of bandages and a large glass of water. I saw his hand move to the back of his pants for a second, and my eyes narrowed. 

 

We peeled away my top layers so that Julien could clean my wounds, my pant leg we just rolled up. Julien quickly rinsed them off with water, "This is going to hurt." He muttered, focusing in looping the thread into the needle to sew the wounds. I closed my eyes bracing myself for the stinging pain. 

 

It took approximately fifteen minutes for Julien to sew all the lacerations. "Hold still, I'm going to give you something for the pain." Julien whispered. I tensed up and moved away. 

 

"Don't give me anything." I snapped. 

 

Julien raised his hands, "It's just painkillers, I promise. Come on Michael, you trust me." 

 

I narrowed my eyes and watched him, he was acting weird. Maybe it's just because he wasn’t used to seeing this much blood, or because he was worried. But my instinct was telling me to leave. I stood up quickly and grabbed my top layers trying to pull them on quickly. 

 

"Wait, please Michael stay! You're wounded, and if you go out you could get an infection or get sick!" Julien begged. He walked closer to me and I backed away. I felt like a wounded animal cornered by a predator. I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand when he reached for the syringe in the back of his pocket. _I knew it, I knew it, I should have never trusted him!_ I thought, and I moved out of the way and grabbed my axe. Without thinking I swung the axe, and the blade connected with Julien's stomach. Tears rolled down my face as I saw him drop to the ground blood running down his mouth. I set the axe down and quickly rummaged the house finding shirted to wearing under my torn clothes. I took anything I might have needed from the home and put them in my bag. I was sobbing hysterically by the time I exited the city. 

 

I sluggishly moved to my small cabin, when inside I curled up on my small bed of pelts. I let the tears flow freely as I pulled off my helmet and gas mask. I placed my head on my pillow and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to stop the scene from replaying in my mind. A sad and cruel thought came to my mind, _What if it had just been pain killers?_


	2. Moving On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Time To Move On Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter may seem rushed but that's because it was rushed when I was writing it for my Creative Writing class, hopefully it wont be to bad.

Two months, that is how long it's been since I foolishly killed the only friend I've ever had. I mean, it's not like he's truly gone. I still see him everywhere, his pale bloodied form always on the edge of my vision, whispering sad torturing words to me. Sometimes he appears in front of me. His eyes are white now, and his skin just as pale as the snow. Blood soaks his chin and throat, and anytime he tried to speak, a waterfall of blood just pours out along with his words. Sometimes his organs are hanging out. I hate that Julien the most. 

 

He follows me everywhere I go now. At first, he was just by the city, but once I stopped going near it, he started appearing in my home, and soon, everywhere. He was always just silent, he never used to talk, it made him feel even less like Julien. I almost cried in relief when he started talking again, but sometimes his words are too harsh and painful to listen to. He always says the terrible things when I'm hunting. Always relating it to what I did to him, it makes it harder to kill even when it's just for food. 

 

But one day Julien said something that startled me, shaking me from my own dark thoughts. "You need to forgive yourself, Michael. I can't stand you wasting away like this," he said. 

 

"I killed you! This is what I deserve," I yelled back at him. 

 

But Julien remained calm, "No, you don't deserve this. You're my friend, and I forgive you, so I need you to learn to forgive yourself now, so I can move on and so you can move on." 

 

I shook my head and crumpled to the ground, kneeling and bending over covering my head. "No, no, no, no, no, you're wrong." I cried. 

 

I saw Julien's ghostly figure kneel beside me. He stared down at me in pity. I felt spectral fingers cup my face, wiping away my tears. "Michael, please do not cry. For I am fine, but I need you to forgive yourself, so you can move on. The only one who is making your life hell now is your own mind. So please, forgive yourself, even if it takes time. Start now so that you can start feeling better faster." He hummed. 

 

"You've changed," I whispered, letting my head rest in the hands of the spirit. 

 

Julien smiled, blood dribbling down his face. "How so?" 

 

"You used to say the worst things to me, and now you tell me I need to forgive myself and move on. I don’t understand you anymore!" I said, sitting up, looking into Julien's dead eyes. 

 

"I am not Julien, Michael. You should know this by now. I am just a figment of your mind that you created to fill the void in your heart. Channeling the dark, morbid thoughts into me. But now you are trying to move on, so now your mind is channeling calmness and forgiveness through me," the figure said. 

 

"I can feel you though!" I shout. 

 

"It is not a real feeling, Michael, it is a memory of a feeling. You need to accept that I am not real," the fake Julien advised. "But now you must rest, your body is exhausted, and so is your mind. Lay down and sleep." I blinked a few times and Julien was gone. Fresh, warm tears dripped down my cheeks as I numbly stood and moved to my bed, lying down.

***

I woke suddenly. Something felt wrong. I looked around, straining my ears to listen. That’s when I heard it, someone calling my name from outside. "Michael! Michael, come here!" My heart jumped, it was Julien. I leapt to my feet and to the door of my small cabin, but I froze suddenly. _I killed Julien. But besides that, I never told Julien where I lived and or how to find it_ , I thought as I stepped away from the door. I slowly moved a pelt, that I use as a window cover, to peer outside. At first all I saw was snow, but as my eyes adjusted to the dim light, I saw a figure outside. Tall, and thin, but it was unforgettable. I had almost just allowed myself to exit my home in the middle of the night and into the snow without any of my gear. I slowly and quietly ducked down and crawled under the small table beneath my window, my axe in hand. It didn't stop calling for me in Julien's voice till morning. When the sun finally shone, I allowed myself finally to fall asleep.

***

When I woke up, it was mid-day. I lifted my stiff body out from under the table, setting my axe on top of it. I walked over to my fire place and stoked the embers to warm some water to wash myself off with. I sat and silently watched the embers eat away at the logs and grow into flames. I dip a small cup into the warmed water and put a rag into the cup. I slowly wiped myself off, resting the warm rag on my sore shoulders and lower back. I glanced around my cabin and sighed. "I need to go hunting today, I'm low on food," I whispered to myself.

 

I put myself on auto mode and just let my mind go blank as I got ready and prepped for the hunt. I walked out into the flurry of snow, trudging through the drifts of snow. I had set traps a few days ago, but if anything has been caught its either been eaten or has ran off, but it wouldn't hurt to check. Somehow, the first trap I checked had a fresh catch stuck in it. My fist clenched around my axe as I brought it down on the young goat's head, giving it a quick death. There was a quiet crunch of a branch breaking, I snapped my head that way, but I saw nothing. I leaned down and quickly got to work tearing the goat apart. I felt my heart beat pick up as the sounds of the forest silenced. The thrum of my blood pumping in my ears kept me alert. Quickly, I packed my bag and sprinted off back towards my cabin. At first it seemed as if I was just running away from nothing, but soon it appeared that my fear was not wrongly placed. Behind me I heard another set of steps, running almost as fast as me. There was no reason to look back, I already knew what was behind me. 

 

_Does my misery attract them, or do I just have the shittiest luck?_ I thought, as I tried to lose the wendigo. I practically dove into my cabin and slammed the door shut and barricaded it. My heart was slamming against my rib cage. I wiped my cold sweat off my face as I shakily started unpacking my bag. _This area has never been this active with wendigos. I've stayed for too long, it's time to move._ I stood and started the cooking the process for my meats. I began to clean the pelts, and after I finished, I got ready to start moving in the morning.

***

I looked upwards and sighed. _Still no Julien, where did he go?_ I frowned but kept walking, it was weird being alone again. I came across a ruined town that I've never seen before. _How long have I been walking? I surely haven't been walking more than an hour or two._ I usually avoid cities, due to their popularity with other scavengers who are willing to kill you just for what you have on your back. Slowly, I walked into the down, hand gripped tightly around my axe. My body was tense, and I never kept my gaze in one place.

 

"Stop right there," a gruff, harsh voice says. I felt the barrel of what I'm guessing to be a gun placed on the back of my head. I slowly raised hand arms up, another figure ripped the axe from my hands. "What are you doing in our town?" the same voice snapped. 

 

"I'm sorry for trespassing, this is just the fastest way through here. I mean no harm, I'm simply just moving through." I kept my breathing calm, trying not to panic. 

 

"We've had a lot of folks 'just passin' through," the person scoffed. 

 

"You can follow me to the edge of town. I assure you I'm just passing through," I said, glancing back, trying to see the person. 

 

A gentler voice piped up, "There is going to be a storm tonight, you should not travel." 

 

"He's not staying. He could be dangerous," the rough voiced person argued. 

 

"I can tell that he means us no harm as long as we mean no harm to him." The gentle voice circled around so that I could see its speaker. A small, gentle woman with a kind smile. A larger, well-built woman walked around the other side of me. She looked skeptical at her friend's belief. "Come, we'll lead you to our home, and you may stay the night," the smaller woman said. I nodded slowly, the two women moved to be on either side of me and led me deeper into the town.


	3. Chapter 3

"Come, sit, get comfortable." The smaller woman hummed. I cautiously sat down near the smaller woman. "Please," she motioned to me, "take your gear off." 

 

"I'm fine, but thank you," I answered. 

 

"Take your head gear off," the larger woman snapped. She proceeded to take hers off revealing long dark hair that lightened almost into a grey at the end. There where thick braids held together by metal pieces littered around her mane of hair. She had very pale skin and light blue eyes. I got a better look at her build; this woman had enough muscle to probably crush my head with her bare hands. 

 

I watched the smaller, or petite woman take hers off, revealing long dark hair that where all in braids. Her skin was a dark brown along with her eyes. She looked at me and smiled kindly, motioning me to remove mine as well. I hesitated, _If they are willing to take theirs off, you can take yours off, Michael,_ I heard Julien whisper in my head. Slowly I removed mine, opting for my gas mask first. They raised their eyebrows in slight surprise at my blonde hair, but they didn’t seem to care. I set my bag down beside me and glanced over at my axe where the larger woman placed it. 

 

"Don't you even dare try to grab the axe, boy," growled the larger woman. 

 

Her smaller counterpart merely patted the other's hand, "He's probably just not used to not having his weapon with him. I suppose since you are staying here until the storm ends--" 

 

"Which will hopefully be tomorrow morning," the larger woman commented. 

 

The smaller woman shot a playful glare at her, "As I was saying, since you will be staying with us till the storm ends, we should probably introduce ourselves. I'm Ezmay, and my big intimidating friend is Ylva." 

 

I glanced between the two and nodded. It's okay, Michael, it's time to learn to trust people again, I will not always be here for you. I glanced around the room nervously, squeezing my hands tightly together, "Michael, my name is Michael," I whispered, not making eye contact. 

 

"It is nice to meet you, Michael, now tell us, why are you traveling this far west?" Ezmay asked, tilting here head. 

 

I watched Ylva stoke the fire. "The cabin I was staying at wasn't safe anymore. Had some bad memories in the area as well, got hard to live there." 

 

"What made it unsafe?" Ylva inquired, her eyes seemed to be tearing me apart. 

 

"I mean it was safe for the longest time, but suddenly the wendigo activity got worse, so I had to leave," I muttered. 

 

"A very good reason to leave I suppose, but why move west?" Ezmay asked. I simply just shrugged in response. "Are you hungry? We don't have much meat left but we have a few edible plants in our garden." 

 

I lifted my eyebrows at the mention of a garden. "You have a garden? How have you managed to keep it alive?" 

 

"We made a small compartment under it where we place warm coals to keep the soil warm, but not hot enough to kill the plants," Ezmay answered. 

 

"We'll I suppose, since you are allowing me to stay, the least I can do if offer to share some of the meat that I packed," I said as I reached into my bag pulling out a wrapped bundle of meat. 

 

"I do not see why you would want to share your meat, meat is very valuable," Ylva said perplexed. 

 

"It's the least I can do," I said, holding the bundle out to her. She pulled out what looked to be a grilling panel on metal legs and set it over the fire placing the meat on it.

***

I woke up feeling groggy and warm. I looked down at myself, wrapped up in my sleeping pelts tightly. Outside I could hear the wind howling. I whined quietly and tucked myself deeper into them, because behind the wind I could hear the fait calling of my name in Julien's voice. I felt something near me shift. I tensed up, not wanting to even breathe as it would be too much movement. _Calm yourself, Michael, look at your surroundings, remember where you are,_ Julien hummed comfortingly in my head. I did as he suggested, and I looked around, memories from yesterday coming back.

 

"Remember were you are now?" I heard Ylva ask, I nodded a little in response and closed my eyes again. "The storm hasn’t stopped so I suppose you can stay again," she said. 

 

"Thank you," I said in a hushed tone. 

 

"If you want, you may join me deeper into the building," she offered. 

 

I sat up, _There's more to the building?_ I thought as I stood up. I tilted my head in curiosity as I got ready to go with her, having figured out that I most likely wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep. 

 

"So, you are coming with?" she asked. I nodded and watched as she grabbed my axe and handed it to me. "You're gonna be needing it," she smirked as she led me to a metal door. She shoved it open and held it for me as I quickly walked through. She gently, but firmly pushed it back into place and resumed leading me into a large hall way. I looked around, the building was holding up pretty well, amazingly. There were two stories to this building and they were lined with little rooms. A lot of the rooms had no doors and were open to just walk in, some of the rooms where covered by a metal gate of some sorts. "See the ones with the metal gates over them?" Ylva asked. 

 

I nodded, "Yeah I seem them." 

 

"We're gonna try and break through them to get in and grab materials from them," she said. 

 

"Won’t that alert anything in the area that we are here?" I asked worriedly. 

 

"You would think so, but I haven't had anything happen yet," she answered confidently. 

 

"Well, I suppose we should get started then," I said, following Ylva up a set of metal stairs. I looked at Ylva. She wore all black, a long almost cape like pelt on her shoulders and back. In her hand she held a sledge hammer. We walked towards a room that had a gate over it. I noticed dents in the gate's little bars. 

 

"I've been wanting in here for a while, Ezmay really isn't strong enough to help me get through this, but since you are here, I can hopefully get some things done," Ylva said. 

 

"What's the plan then?" I asked, looking over the gate. I noticed the glass panels on the sides of the gate and looked at Ylva. "Why haven't you just smashed the glass?" 

 

"It's dangerous, glass shards would get everywhere," Ylva hummed. 

 

"Maybe, just maybe, it we combine both of our strength we could tear it open. Whatever is keeping it closed must be rusted or weakened by now," I noted. 

 

"Maybe we should keep you around after all," Ylva murmured, and she walked over to the gate. "Come on, let's give it a try." We both grabbed ahold of the lower bars and began to try and lift it. I heard a snap and the gate lifted stiffly. 

 

"That was pretty easy," I said, rubbing my palms. 

 

"Very much so. Come on let's go see if there is anything useful." Ylva motioned me to follow her. 

 

_Why does it feel like her opinion has already changed about me? It feels too sudden._ "Y-Ylva, can I ask you something?" I asked. 

 

"I don’t see why not," she sighed, rummaging through some racks of clothing. 

 

"How come it seems that you trust me already? N-not that I mean you shouldn’t but, it's just--" 

 

"You took off your face gear, shared your name, and decided that you should share your food with us even after I placed the barrel of a gun to the back of your head. Whether it was out of fear or the will to survive, you still did it. Many scavengers tend not to do those things even in situations like that. Also, here you are helping me break into these rooms to scavenge. Besides, Ezmay seems to think you are trustworthy, she can read people like a book," Ylva admitted, but she looked at me with a frown. "But she also sees that there is something holding you down and pushing you away from others. So, tell me what happened." 

 

I shifted uncomfortably, knelt beside her and began to rummage with her. Slowly but surely, I told her what happened.

***

"I agree that you overreacted, but you were injured and felt threatened. I don't blame you for what happened to your friend. But I do think you should talk to Ezmay about this, she is much better at comforting and helping people than me. I'm simply the just the brawn, and she is the brain." Ylva sighed, her face was comforting and soft.

 

We had started walking back to Ylva and Ezmay's small hideout. We found Ezmay up, warming up some of the leftover meat from last night. She smiled at us and our findings. "Did you manage to open the room that you've been trying to get into, Ylva?" Ezmay asked. 

 

"With help from Michael, yes, yes we did." Ylva smiled. I give a small smile and scratch the back of my head nervously. Ylva glanced at me and nods. I set some of the things we found besides Ylva's pile and sit across from Ezmay. 

 

I cupped my hands together and tried to calm down, "I-I have something I want to tell you," I said. Ylva watched me for a second and left the room. 

 

Ezmay smiled gently at me, "Take your time, I can tell that what you want to say is painful to talk about. I can wait till you are ready." 

 

I nodded slowly and took a few deep breaths. "I did something very, very bad not too long ago, and it still haunts me everywhere I go. Ylva said that I shou--" 

 

"Do not do this because Ylva said you should. You should talk about it to help yourself move on from what you did. But please, continue I will not interrupt anymore," Ezmay said. 

 

I bit my lower lip and nodded. I started from the beginning, the very beginning. I told her about my hellish childhood and then moved to when I became a scavenger. I skipped a lot of the useless details and moved on to Julien. As I neared to the _accident_ , I felt hot tears roll down my cheeks. Quickly, I wiped them away. 

 

"It is okay to cry, Michael. Releasing emotions helps one heal, and sometimes it just helps you feel better," Ezmay said, walking over to sit beside me. It took me a few minutes to work up the emotional courage to tell her. When I did, I saw her calm demeanor flicker for once. She stared at me, her eyes narrow in thought. 

 

"I think staying with us would be good for you, Michael. I think that it would be very bad for your mind if you continued living alone, solitude was not meant for humans and being alone can allow for your fears and memories to control you," Ezmay said, in a serious manner. 

 

"I don't want to hurt anyone else--" I started. 

 

"What makes you think that you would ever need to hurt us, Michael? Ylva can be loud and threatening, but she would never hurt someone unless she had too. I want you to think about my offer to stay with us till the storm is over, okay?" Ezmay asked. 

 

_Stay, stay, stay, stay._ A quiet voice repeated over and over in my head. I nodded slowly, "Okay, I will." 

 

"Good." Ezmay smiled. "It appears that the meat is finally warmed, I'll grab quickly Ylva, so we can start eating," I wait quietly for the two women to return. We ate in silence, and talked about plans for tomorrow, and whether the storm might end the next day. After that we all said our good nights and laid down for sleep.

***

"Do you remember what I asked you the night of the second day?" Ezmay asked me.

 

I nodded, "If I would stay." 

 

"What will your choice be?" Ezmay inquired. 

 

"I-I woud like to stay," I glanced at Ylva then at Ezmay," If that is alright with you." The two women smiled at my choice. I tensed as they both moved quickly towards me, but they didn’t attack me. They wrapped their arms around me in a welcoming embrace. Their warmth was comforting, calming me down. I awkwardly attempted to hug the both back at the same time. 

 

"It's good you decided to stay, now I have someone to help me out with hunting," Ylva laughed as Ezmay faked an outraged expression. I laughed quietly with Ylva. I glanced to the side as saw the familiar form of Julien, but he was no longer bloodied and gore covered. I would have mistakenly thought he was alive if not for his white eyes. He watched us with a content smile, he looked and me and nodded almost approvingly. I opened my mouth to say something, but his form dissipated up into the air.

***

"We're running out of fresh water. I don't know of any where to get any that won't get us killed." Ylva frowned. It's been about a half a month since I decided to stay, and we quickly ran into new problems. Bedding was not hard to get as many of the rooms within the building they lived in had cloth left over. But hunting had turned from one kill to at least two a day, and water intake increased as well.

 

"I know a spot where to get fresh water. But I don’t know how we could carry barrels of water back. We'd have to find a way to transport them," I said, biting at my nail. 

 

"We could take the sled we keep for emergencies and pull them, follow along designated trails to make travel easier," Ylva replied. 

 

"Trails mean more people, we could get robbed," I said, sighing. 

 

Ezmay cleared her throat, "You two might be the hunters and gatherers, but I know this land just as well. There's a small creek of running water about a half an hour away." We both stared at her before nodded and asking where it was. We watched as she pointed out its location on the crudely made map Ylva had made a year back or so. 

 

The plan was simple: take the sled and the barrels and fill them up and tie the barrels down to the sled and quickly make our way back. We gathered out materials and left as soon as possible. Ylva pulled the sled while I kept watch on the land around us, my axe in one hand and her hammer in the other. I glanced behind us and saw something slink back behind a group of trees, I frowned but kept walking. 

 

I nudged Ylva gently with my shoulder and slipped her hammer into her hand. She frowned at me but nodded. I slowed and started waking at the back of the sled. I kept an eye on our sides and the back. I saw nothing but trees and snow, but a sinister thought creeps into my head. _You know exactly who and what it is. It's not happy that you escaped the first two times, it's here to finally finish its job._ "Ylva," I said 

 

She stopped and looked back at me, "Is everything okay, Michael?" she asked. 

 

"Keep going, I'll catch up with you at the creek. I shouldn’t be long," I replied. 

 

"Are you sure everything is okay, Michael?" she asked, glancing around. I just simply nodded. She watched me for a few seconds, then started walking again. I watched as she left, turning around to see the wendigo revealing itself. 

 

It didn’t waste time in charging towards me. I leapt out of its way, catching myself before I fell and slammed the back of blunt end of my axe into its back. It whipped around, its long black claws caught the side of my face, tearing at mask. I turned my axe, bringing it down on its neck, causing its black, chunky blood to flow out. It roared in pain as it swatted me away. I stumbled back, bracing myself again for another attack. It leapt towards me, its maw open, baring its long needle like teeth dripping with bloody saliva. I felt its teeth clamp down on my shoulder as I dug my axe into its neck again. 

 

It let go. At first, I thought it was dead, but then I felt its head shift. I screamed as I felt it clamp down on my neck. I slammed my axe over and over into its neck wound until I felt it connect and break bone. I coughed, a small bit of blood running down my chin. I shoved its corpse off me and rolled onto my side. I heard hurried footsteps rush my way, I could hear Ylva crying out my name as the world faded to black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Want another chapter after this? Leave a comment saying so! This is where I left off when I finished my class, so I wasn't planning on adding any more.


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